Guilty as charged

Disclaimer: This post contains language that may offend sensitive viewers. Don’t say that I didn’t warn you.

 

Number 1

I chatted to someone recently who had been on a church mission trip into a notably rural area. Maybe the question I asked sounded facetious, but it was lined with a deep seriousness and sincerity: “So, is your life radically changed and turned upside-down from this last week?” The response packed less punch than a three-year-old trying to slay a dragon: “Well, I’ve done it before so…” The answer was so nonchalant, the sentence wasn’t even finished! And I’m screaming in my head, “SO WHAT?”

Number 2

There was an incredible time of worship at church last night through singing and fellowship and the Word. God was ministering truth as we sat in His presence. I gathered my things at the end of the service after chatting with a few people, and made my way to the exit. I packed my car, and left. It wasn’t five minutes into my drive home that I received a text from someone I didn’t care to speak to at that moment and without thinking blurted out, “Fuck! Piss off!” at the top of my lungs.

Number 3

I watch a mother and her child from a distance, walking through a sunlit, car-crowded parking lot. The girl offers to push the trolley and haphazardly shoves it towards the car. “Can’t you just push it straight you little shit, you’re wasting my time – we’re already late. God! You can’t do anything right. It’s simple: hold it tight and walk in a line.” The child was only trying to help. They load the groceries into the silver-coated Mercedes boot and when they slam it shut, I see the foot-long bumper-sticker: “WWJD”.

We all fall short.

We all insult Salvation with our sin.

We all take for granted, this God that is merciful enough to grace us with His presence.

We all toy with the ideology of redemption and repentance.

We all underestimate the conviction that creeps into our hearts.

We all make light the impact of our words, versus the words of Jesus.

We all leave God’s presence unchanged at times.

We all judge when we’re just far away enough not to be burnt by the heat of the moment.

We all have anger.

We all miss God-appointed and God-anointed opportunities.

We all expect too little of the Holy Spirit.

I think of the lyrics by Lifehouse: “And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you”. Have we settled for the convenience of the Cross, allowing it to comfort us when necessary but not letting it change us too much? Have we reached a point where we simply say we need Christ, but compromise as soon as we leave the confines of a church?

The jury finds me: guilty as charged.

The weight of this is heavy on my heart knowing I’ve ridiculed the divine work of perfect, holy God. I am challenged to consider what it is I am doing to demonstrate this God – when people are watching, and when I am alone.

Because I am never alone; there is always God. And my soul yearns only to glorify Him.